Meeting my inner child
Every coaching session in Be Kind is different. Be Kind’s strength in offering retreats for small groups is to offer highly personalized support. Depending on your experiences, what you are going through, the different challenges you have overcome, your story - the approach and tools during the sessions will be different.
But I can share with you my own experience. Today during the coaching session we focussed on my ‘inner child’. But what is this exactly?
Inner child therapy is about reconnecting with ourselves. Reconnecting with the little child we once were and we sometimes forget in the speed of our lives. Our inner child is still here and more than ever she influences our present life. Working on our inner child means understanding, coming back to situations that left their mark on us as a child. Without realizing it, when we were a child, we absorbed a lot. Unconsciously, things are stored and taken for granted. We created our own "truths" during that period, our own beliefs.
Little things can have a lifelong impact on us if we don't do the work to heal the wounds that have affected us when we were young. A simple sentence about something that has been done wrong may have had consequences later on. For example if you, as a child, want more than anything to become an astronaut and you believe in it a lot, when someone comes and tells you in his own way that it may not be possible, you may not feel good enough, or subsequently experience the painful feeling of not being supported. These feelings will stay and transform into negative beliefs about yourself and influence your next experiences.
By working on our inner child, we can reconnect with ourselves, look for the moments that have hurt us or created imbalances in us. Feelings of rejection, abandonment, not being good enough and not being worthy to receive love are often injuries that come up in inner child therapy. Once these elements are determined, we will gradually be able to work on each of these beliefs, which have grown within us unintentionally and transform them to be able to move forward.
In inner child therapy we can do different meditation exercises to reconnect with ourselves. The practice of visualisation can be very interesting, to meet our inner child. By visualising our inner child and imagining ourselves with her in the present moment will make us able to talk to her, support her, comfort her, bring her what she needs and tell her the things she needed to hear.
So today, I met my inner child. Through meditation, I was able to visualise myself at different periods of my life, in different important stages that made me become who I am. I saw myself as a baby, I saw myself as a child, I saw myself as a teenager. I was able to feel the emotions I felt in different stages of my life, I was able to talk to myself and comfort myself. I told my little girl that she doesn't need to be afraid, that she doesn't need to want more and more or to prove things to anyone. I told her that she did what she could, and that nothing is her fault. That she must be proud of what she has done, of the steps she has taken, and that that is enough. I was able to tell her that I was now here for her and apologise for not having found her before.
By planting these seeds, I know that everything still needs to be done. It's a lifelong work, to regain her trust, to make her see that I'm taking care of her... for real. I will now be able to connect with her every day and above all, try to find within her, my child's soul. Sometimes, as we grow up, we let ourselves be overwhelmed by the things we need to do, the responsibilities, the difficulties, the stress. But when you are a child, you know and you feel, that playing and laughing are the most important things to live fully. I am afraid I have lost that part of me, but I know that it’s still there and that it has always been there. It’s up to me to find ways to reintegrate these aspects into my life. That's also what healing is all about... Being free.